Alex Stern (
takecourage) wrote2019-12-24 08:14 pm
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Christmas has always been a weird thing for Alex. She'd been raised at least nominally Jewish (though her grandmother had always cared more about that than Mira, with all of her crystals and her buddhas and her new-age shit), but they'd still had a Christmas tree at home. She'd still gotten gifts. This year is different, though, because this year she's spending it in Darrow, a million miles away from both Van Nuys and New Haven.
And she was spending it with Darlington.
She spends most of the day in her kitchen at Bramford, cooking. She makes a variety of things, traditional and un, stuff that Mira used to make, that her grandmother used to make, things she likes. She'd sent Darlington out the day before to buy wine, since she didn't know the first fucking thing about wine. And there's gifts, and, for the first time in years, Alex feels like she's home.
It's not something she dwells on too long, but it's there.
And she was spending it with Darlington.
She spends most of the day in her kitchen at Bramford, cooking. She makes a variety of things, traditional and un, stuff that Mira used to make, that her grandmother used to make, things she likes. She'd sent Darlington out the day before to buy wine, since she didn't know the first fucking thing about wine. And there's gifts, and, for the first time in years, Alex feels like she's home.
It's not something she dwells on too long, but it's there.
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His Dante, now become an odd kind of Virgil, guiding him through a world almost stranger than the one they'd left behind at Yale.
Alex had given him a rudimentary menu the day before, sending him out for wine and a few of the ingredients she didn't have to hand, and he gamely battled his way through the holiday chaos at one supermarket, then another, until he'd found everything he was looking for. Today, he'd gone out again and back to a store he'd passed a few times before, coming out a few minutes later with a small bag, bright and festive, tissue paper obscuring the contents. As evening falls, he pulls on his new wool peacoat and makes his way to the Bramford, dressed in a soft garnet-colored sweater and his dark jeans from home, a new pair of brown leather oxfords on his feet and the ribbon handles of that small bag looped around his fingers. Going up to the second floor, he fishes the spare key Alex had given him that first morning out of his pocket and unlocks the front door.
"Merry Christmas, Stern," he says, grinning over at her as he sees her still at work in the kitchen. "It smells amazing in here."
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"Thank you," says Alex, glancing over her shoulder and grinning as he comes through the door. "Shouldn't be long, but there's some chopping that you can come and do if you want to be helpful." She's got her hair up in a messy knot on top of her head, her sleeves pushed up to her elbows. "Have you managed to be productive?"
Already, he looks in his element. Of course he does. She's only ever come across one thing that Daniel Arlington couldn't take in stride.
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"I have," he answers, leaning easily against the wall in the corner of the kitchen, staying out of her way until he's instructed otherwise. "I doubt I'll hear anything about transferring until Barton reopens, but I've at least emailed. Picked up a few other things at the mall today, too, though somehow the crowds were even worse than they were the day before."
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"Assholes leaving their shopping to the last minute," she says, smirking and pushing a board of mushrooms and peppers in his direction. "Nice and thin."
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He finds a knife in the small block by the sink before going back to the cutting board Alex had slid his way. "As you command," he says, glancing over at where she's standing by the stove, a wooden spoon in one hand, the other on her hip. He smiles, then turns to the array of mushrooms and peppers and sets to work.
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"Some of us didn't have that," she says, wincing a little when she reminds him that she came here with the crucible. She stands, leaning her hip against the counter and watching him cut up the vegetables.
"This is so fucking weird."
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He keeps chopping, finishing up the mushrooms and finding a small bowl for them in the cabinet near his head. "It is weird," he agrees, looking at her again, a small smile on his lips. "And we know from weird."
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"Yeah, I could have come here without it." When she's half asleep, she still dreams about the horrible clash between the Belladonna and the pain of broken ribs.
She glances at him.
"It's better now you're here."
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Once the peppers are all chopped, he grabs another bowl from the cabinet and scrapes them in, the knife making a faint, rough sound against the plastic of the cutting board. "Here you go," he says, picking up both bowls and setting them down on the counter by the stove. "Anything more?"
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For a moment, she can't even breathe. It feels like he's punched her in the solar plexus, even though he'd said it so casually, with no idea of how much she'd suffered when he was gone. Because he was gone. She tugs the cuff of her jumper over her hand, trying to surreptitiously wipe away the sting of tears.
"I should be so lucky," she says, finally.
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She murmurs that retort, and all he does is smile. "If there's nothing else you need in here," he says again, "I can uncork one of the bottles of wine and let it breathe before dinner?"
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"Yeah, you do that," she says, shifting pans on the stove, starting to pull things together. Letting herself get lost in the task in hand again. "Though I will never understanding why wine needs to fucking breathe."
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He looks through a few of the kitchen drawers until he spots a corkscrew buried at the back of one of them. Alex's kitchen is narrow enough that passing behind her is a bit of a squeeze as she stands there at the stove, and as he goes, he lays a hand briefly at her back--a warning, a notice, a hope to avoid some kind of collision.
Finding the bottles of wine he'd bought the day before, he looks them both over before making a selection and opening it up, setting the bottle and a pair of glasses out on the coffee table next to the gift bag he'd brought.
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She is, as ever, pretty endeared by his rich boy nonsense, drawn to the paradox that is this man in front of her compared with the virtual monk's cell that he'd called a room back at Black Elm. When he touches her back, she leans slightly into the touch; it's unconscious, and she barely realises that she's doing it. Once he's out of the room, she pulls dinner together, serving up and, after a few minutes, coming out into the lounge, juggling two plates and cutlery. She sets his plate down in front of him.
"It's a bit of a mix," she apologises. "It's mostly stuff I remember my grandmother making for Hannukah. Latkes. Keftes...those ones are spinach, and...these are leek. The chicken's got turmeric and cumin." She flushes faintly. "I hope it's okay. It's...all I really know how to cook."
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She'd given him a brief sketch of the menu the day before, when he'd been sent out for wine and those few remaining ingredients, but seeing it all laid out--not to mention smelling it, that rich mix of spices and the faint scent of oil--is a different matter entirely. "It looks delicious," he says, taking note of the faint pink of her cheeks--whether a flush from the heat of the stove, or embarrassment, he doesn't know. "Better than I might do, hosting someone last minute."
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"I don't believe it," says Alex, folding herself into the end of the sofa before she reaches for her wine, taking a sip before she picks up her plate. She doesn't know anything about wine, and even she knows enough to know that it's good. She nudges him with one sock clad foot. "I call bullshit. I bet you cook as well as you do literally everything else I've ever seen you do."
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That, of course, would come a few years later, with a very different sort of experiment and a tarry sludge at the base of a ruined stockpot.
"I'll have to make you dinner one night soon," he continues. "Then you can compare."
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There are, so figures, parallels with how they grew up; how on their own they'd been, only Alex had made a choice and Darlington hadn't had any choice at all. She curls into the cushions, eating her food, lost for a moment in how nostalgic the taste of everything makes her feel.
"We can do gifts after we eat, if you like..."
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"Sounds like a plan," he says when Alex speaks again, nodding towards the gift bag he'd set on the table. "I'd like that a lot."
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Alex doesn't have a tree, but she'd set Darlington's gift on the tv unit, where she'd lit a few candles. The metallic ribbon that it's wrapped with catches the light. "You can stay tonight. If you want. You're going to have drunk too much to drive at this rate."
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He smiles. "I won't even try to convince you to let me sleep on the couch."
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For a moment there, Alex had forgotten, because there he was, so at ease, it seemed impossible that they weren't in New Haven. But they're not, are there? Nothing's changed and, somehow, everything has.
"What's the point in having a king sized bed if I make you sleep on the couch?" she says. Most of the time, they're managing to stay separate but, a few times, she's woken up with Darlington's sleeping form cuddled close. She's really not above taking what she can get.
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They finish their dinner and drink the last of their wine; before Alex can get up, he stands, picking up their empty plates and taking them to the kitchen, leaving them in the sink. As he comes back to the couch, he loops his fingers through the ribbon handles of the gift bag on the coffee table, moving it over to where Alex is sitting. "Do you want to go first, or shall I?"
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"You go first," she says, hauling herself up off the sofa and bringing him the parcel that she'd wrapped. "Full disclosure - it's to replace one of yours that I stole from Black Elm and then...kind of lost."
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After tearing off the paper, he opens the slim box and unfolds the tissue paper inside, smiling a little disbelievingly at the soft brown wool of the beanie inside. "Thank you," he says, genuine and sincere. "It's lovely."
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